Tag Archives: coaching

Sending Christmas greetings to you

Clients and testimonials, ,
Dear friends

“To top off my year my company is closing down. I have been made redundant and my last day will be on 31st December. Thankfully, I have not gone into panic mode. I am very calm and looking forward to another new door opening in my life. I don’t believe I would have this outlook to my future if I had not experienced coaching with you and the support and guidance of my good friend Antoinette, for which I am extremely grateful to you both”.

Sarah Phillips

As Christmas approaches and the year draws to an end I thought I’d take a moment to drop you a line.

What a year it’s been! Currently my life is peppered with people whose jobs have been made redundant and who face the prospect of finding new jobs in a challenging market. Amongst those who are at work some are adapting to significant change and some are anxious about the future.

Of course, in the larger scheme of things, hard times – including the current economic downturn – come and go. And even in the downturn I am constantly reminded that we are not the victim of circumstances – unless we choose to be. I notice how some people are thrilled to face the challenges the recession is bringing and I notice how others, whilst far from thrilled, bring a deep sense of knowing – that they have all the resources they need to face whatever comes their way.

So, as I write, I celebrate you and the support you have given me in 2009. Amongst the resources I treasure are the many people who play a role in my life. Thank you. And I also send you my heartfelt wishes for Christmas and the New Year. May you know at every step on the way that you have all the resources you need.

Warm regards

Dorothy

Coaching? I’d recommend it to anyone

Clients and testimonials, ,

Sometimes, I like to “claim” a client. This is a process whereby I let someone know I think they’d benefit from coaching and that, if ever they decide to pursue it, I’d love to be their coach – or to help them to find the coach who’s right for them.

Sometimes, too, I offer a scholarship to young people with high potential – the future leader, for example, whose employing organisation has not yet spotted their potential or (because of my personal interest and engagement in music and the performing arts) the talented performer or future star.

The testimonial below comes from one such client – someone I “claimed” as a client and who took up my offer of a coaching scholarship. Oftentimes, high performance comes at a personal cost so I am struck by the benefits to my client in his work from learning to look after himself.

Coaching was Dorothy’s idea – it wasn’t something I’d thought of doing. I’ve experienced coaching as personal to me – learning about myself and what I enjoy. It’s been a way of learning how to live in a way that suits me – learning what I want and how to get it.

Before we started working together I was doing my work as well as I knew how but I wasn’t looking after myself and I was experiencing some stress. I wasn’t willing to take risks and I didn’t have the confidence and energy to change.

Coaching has opened up a new way of thinking for me. Now I’m checking in with myself regularly and acting on my own feedback. I’m more relaxed and happy and my confidence levels are higher. I’m working more and better as a result.

As my coach, Dorothy created trust from the beginning and maintained her commitment to confidentiality which was important to me. I get a strong sense of her dedication – her willingness to contribute her time and expertise to help. I also found it quite liberating to be left to set the agenda and to judge the outcome myself. There was no judgment – I’ve never experienced anything like that before.

Would I recommend coaching? Yes, I’d recommend it to anyone. I thought it was for certain people with certain problems but now I realise it’s for anyone.

Coaching: for a renewed sense of purpose and priority

Clients and testimonials, ,
What do coaches do when their nearest and dearest ask for coaching support? Such requests raise many questions. If we coach our loved ones how can we be sure to hold the boundaries between our personal relationship and our relationship as coach and client? And how do we ensure that we bring none other than a coaching agenda to our coaching interactions? Sometimes, the answer is to refer our friends, brothers, husbands or wives to a trusted colleague. This is how Eddie Maguire, Head of IT Delivery in his company, came to be my client in February of last year.

Every client we work with teaches us something about what we most enjoy in our coaching. When I started working with Eddie, I already knew how much I enjoy working with men and women in senior leadership roles – this has, after all, been my heartland for a number of years now. One thing that Eddie and clients like him have taught me is this: that I enjoy working in a deep and lasting coaching relationship with clients. Why? Because such work can be transformational for the client, bringing results which continue way after the coaching has finished.

Eddie is also one of the clients who has taught me that the line between a “corporate” and a “private” client is not always clear. Sometimes my work with corporate clients has focused on personal agendas whilst sometimes those clients who pay for their own coaching can bring an agenda which is entirely work-related and of great benefit to the business in which they work. And either way, my senior leadership clients are as likely to be private clients as they are to be sponsored by their organisations.

What does Eddie have to say about his experience of coaching?

I was already taking part in an in-depth leadership development programme when I started working in coaching partnership with Dorothy.

I’ve had some great results from coaching. I achieved all my early goals for coaching and I got the promotion I was looking for. More than this, I am much more secure in who I am and what I want – coaching, together with our leadership development programme, produced this result. I have greater self confidence and self belief and I know what I have that gives me my place in the company’s future. The big thing is that I no longer question my right to lead and I’m willing and comfortable to be the obvious point of authority.

What would I say about coaching? Coaching has provided a space in which to explore and it’s always about me: it’s about my issues and what I can do. You could say it’s about developing me and not about developing a specific skill set. I always get value from our sessions. I started coaching with some clear goals and, having met them I’m now using it to help with specific issues and challenges as well as defining my next goals.

What would I say about Dorothy as a coach? She always gives me space to dump stuff and then move forward. She’s very good at listening and asking questions – catching the meaning of words and offering challenging questions. I always come away from coaching with the background noise in my head reduced. Our sessions create focus for me, giving me a renewed sense of purpose and priority.

Would I recommend coaching? Yes, I would – particularly for people struggling to achieve their potential or who are unaware of their potential. It’s a mind-expanding experience and an opportunity to expand your horizons – to open up areas of thought you never realised were not there.

Eddie Maguire
Head of IT Delivery

Warmth, vitality – and penetrating questions

Clients and testimonials, Coaching, , ,

One way that coaching clients find me is via my colleagues in the coaching profession. To whom, for example, do you refer your sister or husband or best friend when they ask for your recommendation? And what about the person who comes to you for coaching for whom you’re not a good match?

This is one more reason for coaches to build relationships with their colleagues: it helps to know a range of people to whom you can refer potential clients. Perhaps it’s worth adding that, for me, it’s a hallmark of a professional coach that he or she recognises – and acts on – those times when it’s in the best interest of the person seeking coaching to refer them on: perhaps to another coach, perhaps to another profession.

Personally, I take a very open approach to this process. I do not wish to set up arrangements by which I prioritise any particular coach over any other. I want to be able to give thought to the needs of the person seeking coaching and to make this my chief criterion for referring him or her to a colleague.

Still, as I continue to gather testimonials for the marketing materials for the coaching groups I am planning to run, I’m delighted that, amongst my coaching colleagues, there are some who are happy to refer people to me as potential clients for coaching.

One of these is Dr. Rosie Miller, whom I met via our coaching training and who, like me, is an executive coach. She gave me two quotes to choose from which I share here:

“As a coach and colleague Dorothy brings enormous warmth and playful vitality, alongside a masterful use of the penetrating question. Her own deep commitment to creating the life she wants inspires you to keep your promises and take leaps towards your own dreams.”

“Dorothy’s combination of warmth, vitality, and insightfulness make her a powerful coaching presence. As a coach and colleague she inspires you to continually take steps to be the best you can be.”

Dr Rosie Miller
PCC and International Business Coach

Looking beyond surface answers

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I continue to focus this month on preparing invitations to join a number of coaching groups. Last week I sent out an invitation to New Coaches for a group whose members want to invest in building their coaching practice. Now I’m working on invitations for several groups with a special interest in Non-Violent Communication (NVC).

I’m also starting to talk to my corporate clients about coaching groups for leaders. I’d like to work with a group whose members are focused on building their effectiveness as leaders and another whose members are wanting to develop their coaching style. Of course, if all the groups I am planning come to fruition straight away I’ll have (together with my work with one-to-one coaching clients) a very packed schedule for the year ahead!

I am enjoying the abundance of quotes and testimonials that clients and colleagues have been sending me in response to my request. An initial wave of responses has been followed by a steady stream and I am using these in my marketing materials for the coaching groups. Here on the blog, I hope they will give potential coaching clients a sense of my style and help people to make a choice (either way) that supports them in finding their perfect coach.

The testimonial below is from Chris Mulrooney who was my colleague at the Hay Group. Based in the US, Chris and I crossed paths when we both had responsibilities for the professional development of colleagues and worked together across Europe. I treasured Chris’ ability to look for the best in people and to see their potential as they embarked on learning new skills in some of the technical areas that underpinned Hay’s offerings. He was an inspiration to me then – as now.

Chris left the Hay Group at much the same time as I did and has gone on to senior leadership roles in two successive communities for the elderly – pursuing a passion he has had over the years and putting both his academic learning and his subsequent experience into practice. His testimonial?

I had the great pleasure of serving as a fellow coach and co-trainer with Dorothy for several years in service to Hay Group colleagues in the U.K. and elsewhere in Europe. While I traveled to a number of Hay offices around the globe during my tenure at Hay, I especially looked forward to partnering with Dorothy in the U.K. office during these endeavors. I benefited from having a colleague who asked insightful questions of those we were coaching and of me. Dorothy’s coaching style is warm and engaging, yet she challenges those in her midst to look beyond the surface answers and probe more deeply into the “whys” of behavior. These are the hallmarks of a good coach, and thus I have every reason to believe that Dorothy is of great value to all those she coaches.

Chris Mulrooney

Former colleague at the Hay Group

A true advocate for authentic leadership

Clients and testimonials, Coaching, , ,

As I write, I am savouring the testimonial I received this morning from Lynne, my own coach since 2005.

Lynne wrote this testimonial for me to share with other coaches who might be interested in joining the New Coaches Coaching Group (see http://dorothynesbit.blogspot.com/2009/07/new-coaches-making-transition-from.html). At the same time, it speaks to so much that is important to me in my work across a range of client groups, including my clients in the most senior leadership roles in organisations.

Perhaps it speaks to something else, too – something much more personal. For to work with a coach is to allow oneself to be seen fully and in all one’s glory and in-glory. So, to read Lynne’s quote is, for me, to be have been seen fully and still to have been found with strengths to offer and with personal qualities which have the power to inspire. I am grateful to Lynne for her words:

As Dorothy’s coach, I know that she is a true advocate for authentic personal and professional leadership.

Dorothy is absolutely committed, as a coach, to working with you to access your own innate resources, clarity, and authentic voice. She shines a light on your dreams, passions, and wisdom, and calls you forth into the full expression of those natural talents, in work and in life.

Dorothy brings energy, passion, focus, humour, and wisdom to her life and work. You can count on your journey with Dorothy, either as an individual or group client, to be a spirited one with lots of fun, challenge, and great reward.

As your coach in the New Coaches Group, Dorothy understands your needs and desires. She sponsors your unique dreams and talents. You can look forward to a coach and a group that supports, challenges, and calls you forth to make your vision, of yourself, your business, and your life, a reality. I can’t think of a better coach for you to have on the path of building your coaching practice.

Lynne Fairchild
Professionally Certified Coach

Inspiring others to develop

Clients and testimonials, Coaching, , ,

The joy of receiving testimonials from clients and colleagues continues as I prepare invitations for a number of coaching groups I am planning. Last week I sent out my first invitation – for the New Coaches Coaching Group – and I was thrilled, this morning, to post it on the blog.

I’m also thrilled to share one of the testimonials I included in this invitation, from Lindsey Waddell, who was briefly my colleague at the Hay Group. In 2007 Lindsey recommended me to former colleagues at an organisation she had worked for, a referral which led to an extensive period of working with a City law firm. This was a rich experience for me for which I am truly grateful.

As I write, I think of how valuable such referrals are to me. Often, they help to connect me with clients with whom I am well-suited to work. In addition, the mutual trust and respect that exists from the beginning when I meet clients in this way enables a depth of working and leads to a quality of outcome which create great value for clients and meet my need to do work which is significant for the client in the difference that it makes.

So, in posting Lindsey’s testimonial I celebrate the work I have already done with Lindsey’s help and the sponsorship she has given me by her willing recommendation:

The real pleasure of knowing Dorothy as a colleague and as a coach, is her powerful and infectious enthusiasm for inspiring others to develop. She achieves this by truly engaging you with her curiosty, her integrity, her commitment and her ability to enable you to believe you can be all you set out to be. I would never hesitate to recommend Dorothy and believe her passion for contining development of coaches will enhance the profession significantly.

Lindsey Waddell
Coach and Organisation Development Consultant

Would I recommend Dorothy? Absolutely

Clients and testimonials, Coaching, , , ,

Coaches are regularly invited to coach their clients in areas in which they have no expertise. This can serve to highlight the differences between coaching and other interventions, such as training. For whereas training offers input based on the expertise of the trainer, in coaching the expertise of the coach lies in asking questions, in making observations and in making other interventions which help the client to find his or her own answers.

This was true in a session last month with John Dellarmi who recently started his own business after many years working inside a corporation and wanted to attract new clients to his new business. I am not a marketing expert and wouldn’t dream of positioning myself as such, though I do have my own insights based on my experience of setting up Learning for Life (Consulting). So, it was not my intention to share my own ideas. Rather, my aim was to be curious – to work with John as his coach.

So, when it came to preparing invitations for two new coaching groups which both have an interest in marketing (the New Coaches group and the NVC Marketing Group) John seemed to be a good person to turn to for a testimonial. What did he have to say?

I’d been prevaricating over a number of things and was getting down in the dumps about it. Dorothy was able to constructively get me to question some of my beliefs which were (unbeknown to me) getting in the way of a number of marketing steps that I needed to take. With Dorothy’s questions and coaching I was able to realise that success can be measured in a number of different ways and can be different shades of grey. Feeling energised by our coaching conversation, the next day I put together my own blog, celebrated my success and felt good about what I was trying to do. I would still be prevaricating today (two weeks later) if it wasn’t for Dorothy and really do make sure that I celebrate all my successes, big or small. The $64 million dollar question: would I recommend Dorothy? Absolutely

John Dellarmi
Independent trainer and coach

A unique level of insight and empathy

Clients and testimonials, Coaching, , ,

July is turning into a month of celebration for me as I receive the steady flow of responses to my requests for testimonials to use in the marketing materials I am preparing for the coaching groups I am currently planning.

I had not realised ahead of time what a joyful process this would be for me. I am experiencing it as a celebration of so much that matters to me: my own work and everything that I bring to that work, my colleagues and their willingness – eagerness – to sponsor me, my clients and their commitment to their own learning and growth, the privilege of working as a coach…

Today I’m taking a moment to post a testimonial from Derrick Murray. I first met Derrick when I interviewed him for a job. Executive Assessment is something I also offer and enjoy – what a privilege to have such deep insights into the skills and competencies of another! Derrick got the job, with my longstanding client Munich Re, and I have enjoyed watching him flourish and progress.

Derrick’s feedback?

Although my first experience of working with Dorothy was not coaching related, it was later as an executive coach that her skills and values shone through. She has (in my experience) a unique level of insight and empathy which allows her to interact in a most effective way. Like all good coaching, it’s not always comfortable, but it is always immensely valuable and pragmatically useful from the moment the session ends.

Derrick Murray
Director of Operations Munich Re
UK Life Branch

Thank you, Derrick.

Holding a space (even in cyberspace)

Clients and testimonials, Coaching, , , ,

I start the day with such gratitude for the feedback my colleagues are sharing with me in support of my marketing materials for the series of coaching groups I am beginning to plan. One testimonial came from Hilary Cooke, my fellow contributor on the Training Journal Daily Digest. Only last week I reproduced one of Hilary’s postings on my blog.

I feel so blessed in Hilary’s feedback, so generously given. Sharing it here, with Hilary’s generous permission, I take time to savour it and to let it permeate – sink in:

Hi Dorothy – will be a pleasure – here you go…

There is no doubt that networks are fundamental to good business and can also contribute a great deal to learning. I have to confess that I have a personal interest in studying communities of practice, as the body of evidence is growing that high quality collaboration is becoming increasingly relevant.

The issue with any network for me is that it depends on the quality and integrity of the people included in the network – Why are they there? What do they want? What do they contribute? Do I trust them? Do I trust myself? What are my motives? and in the end, summarised by – Is this network nurturing me and being nurtured by me in appropriate quantity? Am I both giving and receiving in a balanced ecology?

As a self-employed consultant, I’ve joined and left many virtual and real networks over the years. One that I have stayed constant with is TJ Discussion Forum, (formerly known as UKHRD). I can’t trace how long this has been part of my mostly daily routine, but my hunch is eight years or so? (is it – I don’t know but I think so).

As a virtual community and internet forum, I find it constantly fascinating how we reveal ourselves by our written responses to each other. I also find it a welcome break to be able to communicate in a considered fashion, being able to take time to let things land and settle and process the response I wish to make. I find that this encourages my reflective practice and then the sharing adds another dimension to my learning by the responses I create.

One of my favourite co-contributors is you Dorothy. I think that if we met, we would become firm friends and stalwart colleagues. So, what do I value about you…?

I find your postings and way of conducting yourself to be extremely gently mannered, generous and gracious – you pay attention to the little things like thanking people and acknowledging them which I value. You are impeccable with your words and insightful in what you pick up from others.

I also experience you working to really hear people – you hold a space, (even in cyberspace), for others to do their own realising, without shunting solutions at them (which some others are inclined to do). Your style comes from your mastery of the incisive question, which in turn comes from an ability to listen properly. I know that the ability to do this is connected to allowing space for ourselves, which is the result of a high level of self awareness and work on ourselves. It’s the ultimate ability to recognise that less is more. I like that about you because it resonates with my own practice aspirations. I have a hunch that this is your coaching style too.

You clearly have a good development pedigree and sound body of knowledge with the Hay Group, ITS and NVC, that I know about from your sharings, but it’s more about how you use your knowledge to integrate these into your practice extremely elegantly. You manage the combination of intellect and feelings in a fine balance I think. You are a good example for NVC and in walking the talk about your beliefs and values in supporting people without sucking their power by over-helping.

You are also clearly cultured and share this without being a snob or making other people feel “less than” – which is also elegant in my book. I have a strong sense of being “equal” with you and that I could push and pull and that you would flex with me. I would actually trust you to coach me personally, and I can count on a very few fingers that people that I would say that about – and that is partly about skill, but more about shared values and the ability and strength to manage our own truths.

These are my experiences of you and it is a pleasure to share them with you. I am so glad that you asked – asking for what we want is a strength in itself.

My gift to you – use this to do whatever will benefit you from doing so with my full permission.

Hilary Cooke

Thank you, Hilary.