In recent weeks I have written a couple of times about the idea that we have different “parts”, in my postings From the stable of NLP: parts integration and Championing your inner parts.  But how many parts do we have?  And how do you begin to identify your parts?  This question was brought to me recently – though not for the first time – by a client who was becoming aware of the different parts of her which were responding in diverse situations.

In case you’re wondering what on earth I’m talking about, I offer an example from my own experience.  I remember taking part in a major research project, in 1999, into what differentiates the most outstanding teachers.  The project included visiting schools across the country to interview 180 teachers, as well as observing lessons and a range of additional activities.  Since I have no children of my own my visits to school are rare so my first visit to a school on this project reminded me powerfully of my own school days – it was as if Dorothy the school girl was showing up all over again with all the fears and excitements she brought to her own experience of school.  The experience of visiting that first school was, at the time, a strong invitation to that younger me.

How many parts do we have?  Caroline Myss, in her book Sacred Contracts:  Awakening Your Divine Potential, draws on Jung’s theories to highlight the role of universal archetypes in our lives, suggesting that each of us has up to twelve archetypes that are strongly in play in our lives as well as others whose energies come into play in particular situations.  Further, she suggests that each archetype has both a positive and a “shadow” side and, as such, are guardians of important lessons as part of what she calls our “sacred contract”.

Many clients of coaching, for example, are familiar with – and in all likelihood frustrated by – their saboteur archetype.  This is the part of us which can cause us to hold back and to make choices which block our own empowerment and success.  “What can be the good in that?”, you might ask.  In some schools of thinking the saboteur is cast as a “gremlin” which we are invited to ignore.  In some schools of thinking, the saboteur is seen as the guardian of our safety.  Myss sees the saboteur as the guardian of an important lession for us:  drawing to our attention situations in which we are in danger of being sabotaged or of sabotaging ourselves.  With awareness, we can learn to heed the warnings of the saboteur and to avoid making the same mistakes repeatedly.  Without awareness, the shadow saboteur will manifest in the form of self-destructive behaviour or the desire to undermine others.

Myss’ book is a rich resource for anyone who wants to study this subject more fully and includes descriptions of a wide range of archetypes which help the reader to identify their own “support team”.  At the same time there are other ways to become familiar with our parts so I offer some questions here as my “starter for ten”, in case you want to identify and get to know your parts:

• In the different areas of your life, which “you” is showing up?  Take time over days, weeks or months to notice the different “yous” who show up across the full range of your life;
• As you identify each “you”, notice what you know about him or her.  How old is she, for example?  How tall?  What does she wear?  Where does she hang out?  I could go on… 
• In the way that she’s showing up right now, is she a force for good or ill in your life?  How do you respond to him or her?  This is an important question, highlighting areas where you have yet to learn to cooperate with your parts and to work together to the benefit of your learning and progress;
• What is the primary intention of each part?  What purpose or even lesson does he or she represent in your life?  To what extent have you learnt that lesson?

In most cases, we have parts that we favour and some that we firmly reject.  Understanding the purpose each part plays in our lives can lead us to new learning and to a relationship with each part which supports us rather than undermines us.  For this reason I invite you to welcome each part – each “you”.