Andrew was a brilliant student, graduating from a leading UK university with a First Degree. He had embarked on his career with an ambition to become Finance Director of a FTSE 500 company by the age of 35. Andrew’s clear goal gave him direction early in his career, providing momentum and guiding his actions in line with the goal set by his 21-year-old self.

As his career progressed, however, Andrew discovered that this goal was no longer serving him. In his early 30s he realised it was unlikely he would meet his goal and he began to tell himself he was failing. What’s more, in quiet moments of honesty, Andrew realised that he wasn’t enjoying the path he had chosen.

The person who is match fit is highly attuned to what he or she wants and keeps this constantly under review. This is the person who understands the difference between surface desires (if you like, the form a desire might take) and the underlying needs that might be met by a goal or ambition. This allows a high degree of flexibility and makes it more likely that a need might be fulfilled or a goal met.

The person who is match fit is also attuned to different kinds of needs and has answers to any number of questions about what he or she wants. How do I want to be in this life? What values do I want to live my life by? What outcomes do I want to work towards? Above all, the person who is match fit goes beyond form to ask: and what would that do for me? Asking this last question guides the person who is match fit towards his or her deepest needs.

Here are some questions to help you to identify the extent to which you are able to know what you want:

• To what extent do you have a clear vision of what you want your life to become?
• How clearly have you identified and “signed up to” things that you want in your life (the values you want to live by, the way you want to be, the kind of relationships you want to have etc.)?
• To what extent do you know what needs you are trying to meet at any given moment in time?
• How well are you able to distinguish between the needs you are trying to meet and the strategy by which you might meet them?
• How aware are you in the moment of times when your needs are being met and of times when your needs are not being met? And how well do you understand what needs are – or are not – being met?

What additional questions would you offer in relation to knowing what you want?