There are times in our lives when those things that are calling for our attention give us a nudge.

In 2006, during the months after the death of my father, my energy dropped for a while so that I chose to say no to some things to which I would normally say yes. This was a time when I learnt which relationships supported and nurtured me and which relationships asked more of me than they gave to me. This was a time when I learnt which people looked to me for help and support at a time when I couldn’t give it – and couldn’t take no for an answer.

Returning from holiday and in the midst of jetlag something similar seems to arise. Six months after my cleaner moved away from London I already had a creeping awareness that it’s time to find someone to replace her. Coming back into the house on my return from holiday this gentle awareness is replaced by a sinking of the heart as I see how neglected my home seems. And finally, in the midst of pouring rain, I call Paul the roofer to make an appointment for him to take a look at my roof.

Working with clients in coaching, as I do, I am aware that the issues that greet us in these moments can vary hugely. They include all the gently nagging questions in our lives. Am I in the right job? Should I stay in my marriage and make it work or leave and face the consequences? Will I ever get the promotion I am seeking without the support and sponsorship of my boss? There are of course many ways to avoid these and other questions, from the circular inner dialogue that keeps us just where we are, through the arguments with our loved ones that keep our eye away from the key issues, right through to the glass of wine that dulls the senses.

So, in these moments of coming home, we have the choice – whether or not to come home. In these moments we decide whether or not to come home to ourselves and to be present to what’s truly alive in us and asking for our attention.