It’s not often I do it and still… today I’m sending out details to my network of an event I’ll be attending on 29th March, when Jason Stein of Heart of Business will be offering a workshop for small business owners under the banner:
Are you ready to have other people happily help you grow your business?
Jason has ten years experience as a certified nonviolent communication trainer in the States and has a passion for business. I know him via Heart of Business.
If you’re interested to learn more, take a look by clicking here. You’ll find details of the course and also an interview with Jason which may be of interest whether or not you’re interested in attending the event.
Especially if you’re finding it hard to make the contribution you want to make in the world and to achieve the level of income you yearn for to meet your needs comfortably, Jason is someone you might like to know about.
Oh! And whether you’re interested or not get this: I’m sharing details of Jason’s workshop because of requests he made of his network in recent weeks. The first was a no-pressure, how-would-you-like-to-help request he made when he was first thinking of planning his trip. Way to go, Jason!
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Kitchen celebrations
A thing of beauty is a joy forever
John Keats
Endymion
Yes, the kitchen is finished! After three months of a world turned upside down I am now in the process of deciding what goes where, gradually moving things from the dining room into their new homes in the kitchen. There has been much washing of builders’ dust from mugs, containers etc.
Winter has also returned and my camera is not coping well with today’s gloom so the photos above and below are already a week or two old. Final touches have been done. The magnificent sculptural shelves below are peopled with cook books, gardening books and a teapot or two.
I am totally in love with the kitchen. I notice already how much more pleasure I have even in the simple act of making a cup of tea. Edward, my nephew, is not the only person who has commented on the “country” feel of the kitchen and Gary’s sister-in-law, who teaches interior design, commented favourably when she popped by recently – this is not so much a kitchen as a room. It’s a place to live in, for sure.
In this moment of writing – in haste and between coaching calls – I am also aware of the journey that has taken place in my house over the last three months and the enormous challenge of working in the house whilst also having such a major project done. At times I have been giving 10-minute warnings ahead of coaching calls (and am grateful both to Gary and Wills for their flexibility and to clients for their understanding when occasionally the sound of drilling erupts in the background).
There have been conversations to be had and decisions to be made at times I would otherwise have spent working. I have loved my close involvement in this project and saying yes to this project has also meant saying no to other things, including my work.
I reflect that one of the challenges in life is that saying yes to one thing always means saying to no to others. I wonder, what are you saying yes to?
Savouring a ‘thank you’
I’ve had a busy start to the year. As well as working with a portfolio of coaching and consulting clients I have been on the steep uphill curve of ‘project mobilisation’, conducting a number of assessments for a new client on behalf of my former employer, The Hay Group. This has meant getting up to speed on a new process and report format with more tiny details than I handle with ease – details which, in any case, have been subject to adjustments along the way.
Last week, I had my final debrief (for now) with one of the people I assessed. He thanked me for my time and gave unsolicited feedback which he subsequently shared in an e-mail with his line manager and with my colleagues at the Hay Group. The next day, our project manager sent an e-mail saying thank you to the whole team.
In the midst of so many thank yous I have taken time to reflect on the team of which I am a member. The central project team have liaised with me to arrange dates, manage the flow of information so that I have everything I need for each assessment and so that our clients get their reports exactly when they need them. Members of the Hay QA team have provided an essential point of reference as we calibrate our scores across the team and between our own team and our client’s other main provider. Members of the wider project team have liaised with the client at a high level to clarify what’s needed and provided a flow of information which has also supported the process. I could go on…
I have also taken time to reflect on my own contribution. There have been calls ahead of assessments to clarify the context for the assessment and ensure I am well-briefed. There have been early-morning starts, travelling to meet with clients and conduct interviews and, afterwards the writing of reports and debriefs with assessment candidates and their line managers. I have employed many skills I have (including interviewing, analysing, writing, coaching) and some I don’t (it’s a miracle I manage to arrive in the right place at the right time – such organisation is a learned rather than a natural skill for me). I like to think I have done good work and I’ve certainly done it with the intention to add value to each client as well as to support an organisational (promotion) process.
One thing I do notice is this: that our project manager, rather than say ‘well done’, said ‘thank you’. Oh! How sweet this is to my ears! Perhaps it’s only me and still, I’d much rather hear someone’s appreciation of my work and the difference it has made to them than I would hear someone’s judgement. To me, the work I do has meaning because it makes a difference to someone or something and this is what I hear in a thank you.
Do you say ‘well done!’ or ‘thank you’ to those you lead?
Kitchen confessions
I know, I know… it’s time I gave an update on the progress of my kitchen. Is it finished yet? In fact, Jeannie Morrison, my friend and fellow member of the London Symphony Chorus, was kind enough to e-mail before Christmas and to express her hope that I would be enjoying my brand new kitchen at Christmas. Sorry, Jeannie, I’m not there yet.
An old Chinese cupboard before its kitchen transformation
The amount of preparation has been prodigious. The walls have been stripped. The chimney breast has also been stripped back to the brick work along with a section alongside it. And because the bricks were in such a poor state, Wills rebuilt part of the chimney breast. The old sink has been moved round so that the window at the end of the room can be taken out to make way for a door. And now the new door is in, Wills has started the process of converting the old doorway to a window. I could carry on – but you get the idea.
You may spot part of the old cupboard as well as
getting a rough idea of the design of the new kitchen
Gary, who spotted a 19th Century Chinese cupboard (rather worse for wear) and saw its potential, has been working miracles with it in the kitchen, creating a cupboard as planned with the central section of the original piece and another wall-to-ceiling cupboard to house the boiler. If only he’d consent to having his picture taken I might have caught his boyish delight this morning when we discussed just what a success this is proving to be. And yes, the picture above also gives you some idea of the state of my kitchen at Christmas. Fortunately, my nephew Edward, who lives with me, was away and – when I was not with friends and family – it was just me at home. Oh! Me and the mouse that is! Seen once but not since.
New appliances are multiplying in the lounge
Over time, various appliances have been delivered and some of them are biding their time in the lounge. The new sink has been with me for a while, and now the dishwasher, a new radiator and (I confess) the first proper kitchen bin I have ever owned, are all ready and waiting. It feels so grown up!
I’m smiling as I write, recognising that I, too, share a good deal of Gary’s childlike glee. I’m also smiling because I recognise just how many of my friends see this kind of experience as the ultimate nightmare. I think of Roger Hamilton’s book Your Life, Your Legacy: An Entrepreneur Guide to Finding Your Flow which I’ve mentioned before on this blog. Hamilton highlights different ways in which entrepreneurs generate wealth and I know that my own signature approach to generating wealth is primarily creative. I am loving the creative process of designing the new kitchen. Even in our private lives our key strengths and preferences show up.
After a racist thought, what do we do next?
Well! Diane Abbott does seem to have put her foot in it! A quick Google search threw up an article by The Telegraph which highlighted reports that forty people complained about her comments to the Metropolitan Police, which is probably the least of her troubles. All in all, we’ve all had a field day discussing this particular gaff.
As it happens, I had a curious experience over the weekend. By way of background, I have a neighbour – a few doors down – who likes to play his music very loud and often late at night. At times I’ve knocked on the door to ask him to turn it down – usually unheard above the music. At times I’ve asked for help from the “noise patrol” of the local council. At times I’ve resorted to using the earplugs that are supplied occasionally when I’m seated by the organ speakers at a concert when I sing. I have managed to speak with my neighbour a couple of times and, most recently, agreed that next time it happened I would send him a request, by text, that he turn the volume down.
So it was that at about 1.30am on Saturday morning I texted him with said request when his music woke me up. I was half asleep and eager not to wake up any more fully than necessary. I sent the text, turned off my phone and was successful in going back to sleep. In the morning I woke up to a couple of text messages. The first let me know he’d got my text and had turned his music down as well as wishing me a Happy New Year. The second was a response to my lack of response and included the following:
….given the fact that u find it difficult 2 reciprocate a simple happy new year has made me realise ur colonial mindset which ur apparently unwittingly a victim of n probz dont even realise it to the point of even feeling justified.
I am so unused to being spoken of in this way that I chewed it over in the morning with Edward, my nephew and Gary, who is working in my kitchen at present. Of course, it would be easy to go to precisely the place my neighbour describes – the place of feeling justified. It seems so obvious to me that my neighbours don’t want to hear too much noise that I feel some anxiety when I listen to Radio 4 in the summer whilst gardening – how does my neighbour not understand this, too?
Maybe one of the reasons – the reason, even – that Diane Abbott’s Tweet stimulated so much discussion is precisely because it offered an opportunity to accuse the accuser. No matter what atrocities our ancestors may have committed or we may commit now, we don’t like to be seen as racist. Ms. Abbott’s misfortune was to show her own biases even whilst being known for campaigning against the biases of others. And perhaps at a deeper level her misfortune was this, to have imagined that racism is the sole domain of any particular racial group.
Coming as this does in the aftermath of the trial and conviction of Gary Dobson and David Norris for the murder of Stephen Lawrence I tread with care, recognising just how much people can – in the words of my neighbour – feel justified in carrying out the most awful acts of violence. The murder of Stephen Lawrence has been a bitter reminder of this fact throughout the last eighteen years. At the same time, it seems to me that we need to show ourselves – and each other – enough compassion to recognise that we are all, more or less, racist: to see the differences in the “other” is the natural response of one who fears. For me, the important question is this: having had a racist thought, what do I do next? And equally, how do I respond to the racist thoughts of another?
I responded to my neighbour’s text as best I could and with the intention of keeping the door open to communication and understanding. This was not because I have an intrinsic need to be on good terms with this particular neighbour or even because I’d like to be able to talk to him about the noise he makes. Rather, I recognise that his comments may well be a sign of how tender issues of race are for him and, whatever my own perspective, I want to see beyond my own response to understand a fellow human being.
Go big or go home – starting the year with lessons from Lady Gaga
It’s January, 2012 – the beginning of a new year. The turning of the year is often a time for reflection – a time when we look back at the year just gone and forward to the year ahead.
Lady Gaga’s rise to fame reminds us just how much can change in a short space of time. You may not remember – believe, even – that as recently as the autumn of 2008, Lady Gaga was the little-known supporting act to a reunion of the erstwhile boy-band, New Kids On The Block.
Recently I was intrigued to come across a case study (from the Harvard Business School, no less) exploring the decisions Team Gaga faced when an untimely action by rapper Kanye West put Gaga’s future at risk. In a summary of this case, the heading Go big or go home highlights the decision that opened up in what could well stand as a lesson in how to assess and manage risk.
“But let’s keep it light” you may say, “and step gently into 2012”. So for now I offer this question as you look forward to the year ahead: what’s your ‘go big or go home’ decision for 2012 – the one that could transform your future?
If you’re willing to share, please use the comments box to do so. If you prefer to read about Lady Gaga, click here.
Putting a smile on the face of life in 2012
2012. Some people believe that the world ends this year – based on the prophecies of the Mayans, whose calendars extended as far as 2012.
Maybe it will, though it doesn’t need to end without humour, as some of our colleagues in the marketing industry have been reminding me with the Lynx 2012 ad. In case you haven’t seen it yet, take a moment to watch it by following this link.
Whether you’re celebrating the beginning of a new year or anticipating the end of the world, I hope life puts a smile on your face in 2012 – or that you put a smile on the face of life.
Asking the right questions as the year draws to a close
This was my last posting of the year for Discuss HR and also published on the HRUK group on LinkedIn. As the year draws to a close I thought you might enjoy it here, too:
Recently I came across a talk by Icelandic President Olafur Grimsson, describing how Iceland bounced back after firstly the world financial meltdown of 2008 and then the Eyjafjallajokull volcano sent Iceland high-speed into economic meltdown.
It’s easy to forget the drama of Iceland’s experiences (unless, of course, you had money invested in Iceland’s apparently safe and secure economy) in the light of the wider events of 2011 – the deaths of Osama bin Laden and Colonel Gaddafi, dramatic events in a number of Middle Eastern countries, freak weather events in Japan, Thailand, Australia… to name but a few. More locally, Berlusconi finally stood down as Italy’s long-standing Prime Minister and, in the UK, London saw anti-cuts protests, protests against plans to raise tuition fees and protests – together with people in countries around the world – against capitalism and its effects. In the summer riots shocked the nation – one of them right outside my front door. As I write, the fate of the Eurozone is still in the balance.
Outside my front door, Monday 8th August, 2011
Some alternative thinkers see these and many other events as part of a significant transition to a new epoch. A number of authors have written about the Mayan prophecies for 2012 and one of them, Diana Cooper (in her book Transition to the Golden Age in 2032: Worldwide Forecasts for the Economy, Climate, Politics and Spirituality), points to a twenty-year period of transition before we enter a new, “golden” era in 2032.
All this probably seems more or less remote from our day to day world of work: what, you may ask, does any of this have to do with HR? As the year comes to a close, I come back to the talk I mentioned at the top of this article. Watching it, one of the things that strikes me is how, in responding to the events that befell Iceland in 2008, Grimsson – as new President – identified and responded to some of the key questions that were raised by those events. Grimsson highlighted the social unrest that followed the world economic events in a country that had a lasting history of peaceful democracy and which threatened that democracy: Iceland’s response – to initiate and execute comprehensive political, judicial and social reform – was borne out of the conviction that the issues of the day required an appropriate response and that anything less would not be sufficient.
Writing the last pre-Christmas posting for Discuss HR, I find myself wondering what are the key questions for you as 2011 draws to a close – what are the issues you face and what would be a sufficient response? Some of these questions will be key for you as an individual. Some of them may be key questions for you as an HR Practitioner and even for HR as a whole. I hope you’ll share some of those questions as comments (and perhaps your answers) below.
For my part, I wonder if the key questions that face us all are the questions that connect us both with our heads and our hearts. These are questions which, whilst stimulating thought and reflection, remind us of what really matters to us in our work and our play. For this reason, my own key questions at the end of the year are these:
- As the year draws to a close, what has been most significant for me about 2011?
- What do I celebrate about this year – what needs of mine have been met? What do I mourn – what are the needs I really want to meet that have yet to be fulfilled?
- Looking forward, what’s it time for – in my life, in the life of my business? What are the outcomes I most desire in 2012?
- What are the implications of my desires and aspirations in terms of where I invest (my time, money, energy and other resources) in 2012?
- What factors in the world around me are most significant for me in 2012? What challenges will I need to overcome in order to make progress towards my desired outcomes?
- What resources do I have that will help me to meet those challenges and to make progress towards my desired outcomes?
Saying goodbye to 2011
Today I post my last post of 2011 before enjoying a full ten days’ holiday. My first posting of 2012 (and my second, and third…) is already written and scheduled for publication.
In the period prior to Christmas I have been sharing tales of my new kitchen and these continue. The process has been slower than I anticipated (and I knew it would be slow) with the usual knock-on effect of unanticipated delays. In particular, the new door to the back of the house has not yet arrived which means that the current back door has to be kept in use. This, in turn, means delaying the conversion of this back door to a window and – until this conversion can take place – building the units along the side wall.
It’s a curious reminder of one of life’s inconvenient truths: sometimes things just take longer than we anticipate. When we understand this we can bring compassion and humour and adapt to new realities – though some prefer to find someone to blame than to accept what is true. It seems to me that it’s a good thing to be reminded of this truth as we enter a time of reflection – moving from the end of one year to the beginning of another.
So, I close by reiterating my best wishes to you for the end of 2011 and for 2012. And by sharing just a few photos from the kitchen at 14 Albion Way.
So much of the kitchen is currently in the dining room…
…or outside in the garden…
…whilst work in the kitchen goes on
Sending seasons greetings
The year is drawing to a close. I am grateful that my work is quieter than usual in the week leading to Christmas, especially as the work in my kitchen continues. It’s been a challenge to work effectively against a backdrop of noise and dust.
The work is, though, turning a corner. Some of the noisiest work – stripping back the fireplace and making a hole for a new back door – is done now. Wills has been plastering the new ceiling which gives a first glimpse of the kitchen as it will be in future.
In the midst of a busy day I take a moment to think of all the people who – well, people – my life. I have been busy sending cards and greetings and still, this is not enough to reach everyone who matters to me. I feel playful, and take the opportunity to write my good wishes on the last of the old paper in the kitchen. Soon it will be gone, though my good wishes remain.
In words often attributed to Confucius (see this interesting explanation of the origins of the phrase) we do indeed live in interesting times. Our futures – individual and shared – are uncertain. The kind of material prosperity we have come to take for granted may or may not be ours – may be some of ours but not all of ours – in the years ahead. As I write I wish you prosperity of other kinds – prosperity in your own resourcefulness, spiritual prosperity, prosperity of wisdom, prosperity in love, friendship and the richness of emotions experienced fully as well as prosperity of many other kinds. May you find you have everything you need to enjoy 2012, whatever it may bring you.