All posts by Dorothy Nesbit

Leadership: more than skin deep (3 of 5)

Developing as a leader

Leadership development: up close and personal

Early in her life, Susan’s* mother told her “if you want to succeed in your career, you need to outshine all the men around you”. Throughout her career, Susan took care to measure herself against her male peers and to be sure to surpass them in a number of areas of performance.

Susan’s drive and determination made her an asset to her employing organisation and she was rapidly promoted to a senior level. At the same time, her intense effort often exceeded the level of investment needed to achieve her goals and she started to suffer from exhaustion. What’s more, Susan’s leadership style was such that even her most senior staff depended on her for answers to the team’s most significant questions. Susan often felt anxious about taking a break, knowing that her staff depended on her so much. She was also unaware that, by positioning herself as the ultimate source of answers, she was limiting the team’s performance in line with her own limitations.

It took the curiosity, compassion and insight of her doctor to help Susan to identify the link between her behaviours as a leader and her mother’s early advice. Listening to her doctor’s questions, Susan was immediately able to understand that yes, there was a link. Something was driving her behaviour of which she had previously been unaware. At the same time, understanding the link was only the beginning: it was the help of a skilled Executive Coach that enabled Susan to adjust her values and beliefs to support a new leadership approach.

John* joined his organisation from school and worked his way up the career ladder. By the time he was eligible to participate in his employer’s leadership development programme he was already well schooled in the official and unofficial rules of the business.

John came away from the programme with a clear understanding of the impact across the organisation of a largely coercive and pacesetting style of leadership. Leaders exemplified excellence and expected others to emulate them. They often gave orders and rarely took the time to get to know their employees, seek their views and opinions or provide feedback and coaching support. During a period of rapid growth, there had been some benefits to this approach. However, John recognised its limitations and decided to develop his repertoire of styles to provide a clear vision for the future and coaching support for his staff.

Back at work, John found the reality of this journey far more challenging than the theory. He recognised that there was a gap at times between his aspiration and his practice (or “theory in use”). Even when he was seeking to provide coaching support, his direct reports were wary at times, accustomed to his former style and lacking trust in the changes he was beginning to make. The fact that he was learning and his coaching style was inconsistent contributed to the unease of staff members.

What’s more, John was under pressure from his own line manager to push for business results which he thought were unrealistic in a challenging business climate. After a while, John used his learning to begin a search for a new employing organisation in which the predominant leadership style was more closely aligned to his aspirations as a leader.

Susan and John’s stories illustrate both the deeply personal nature of leadership development and the challenges of adapting your leadership style in an organisation. Together, these examples begin to point the way to the steps organisations need to take if they’re serious about bridging the gap between leadership theory and the day-to-day practices of leaders in their organisations.

*Susan and John are fictional characters designed to illustrate the nature of leadership development. Any likeness with specific individuals is unintended.

Leadership: more than skin deep (2 of 5)

Developing as a leader

Given the clarity of the theory, why does so much leadership development fail to “hit the spot”?

From parenting, via education to leadership, it’s rare for people and organisations to dig beneath the surface and identify a fundamental and integrated set of beliefs, values, thoughts and behaviours to which they make an ongoing commitment. Many efforts to develop leaders are not rooted in a clear understanding of research findings and may even be rooted in beliefs and behaviours which are in some way internally inconsistent. No wonder then, that many attempts to support leaders in their development fail to hit the spot! This is about the foundations which underpin leadership development programmes and other interventions.

Why isn’t this gap obvious to those who commission leadership development programmes or participate in them? One reason is that many programmes are limited in their scope so that participants never identify the inconsistencies within a programme. As well as the failure to identify a fundamental and coherent leadership philosophy, limitations also include training at a behavioural level only and failing to provide sustained support to leaders’ development over time.

Perhaps the most significant reason why so much of leadership development fails to hit the spot is because the parties involved – from commissioning clients, their partners in leadership development and the leaders themselves – fail to voice and acknowledge one of the fundamental truths of leadership development: that developing as a leader is deeply personal and involves exploring personal values, beliefs and behaviours. This can mean that development programmes are designed without taking into account the nature of the journey and what it takes to support participants as they learn.

Leadership: more than skin deep (1 of 5)

Developing as a leader,

My newsletter went out last week and I decided to share the article I wrote here on my blog in chunks – this is my first chunk.

Given the abundance of research into what differentiates the most outstanding leaders, why does leadership practice fall so far short of the theory? And what are the implications for organisations as they plan for the development of their leaders?

Outstanding leadership: what does the theory tell us?

In 1960, Douglas McGregor proposed a simple theory of leadership, in his book The Human Side of Enterprise, which has become commonly known as the XY Theory. According to his theory, leaders fall broadly into two types. The X-type manager believes that staff dislike work and will avoid it if they can, relying on the threat of punishment to compel staff to work. The Y-type leader believes that effort in work is as natural as work and play and trusts staff to apply self-direction in pursuit of organisational goals. Both types of leader, according to McGregor’s theory are “right”: their beliefs predict the behaviour of staff over time.

More recently, Daniel Goleman has shared a view of effective leadership in his book The New Leaders which outlines a range of leadership styles which the most effective leaders are able to draw on to meet the needs of the situation. Goleman and his co-authors draw on rigorous academic research which has been widely tested in organisations.

These are just two models of effective leadership amongst many and have in common an underlying belief that people are self-motivated and can be relied on, with the right support, to draw on their own resources to work effectively. This is a theme which Daniel Pink has explored, drawing on research findings, in his recently published book, Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us.

Moments in history

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So much of our life experience is a reflection of where we put our attention, so that it’s interesting to consider what our news tells us about our national psyche. Some would say that it’s always the same old news. Some might even say it’s always the same old bad news. Tonight, though, as I go to bed, I am somehow enlivened by the day’s news.

For the first time since 9/11 the nation’s airports are closed to airborne traffic and for (what seems to me to be) the quirkiest of reasons: the drifting cloud of volcanic ash from Iceland. Now, I must confess I am putting aside the opportunity to focus on the distress of the nation’s flyers even whilst recognising that for some this has been considerable. For in the long run, isn’t it quite cool to be able to say: “do you remember that time when we were due to fly to xyz and our flight was cancelled because of volcanic ash?” Besides which, even volcanic experts have to have their day. It might be a while before another opportunity comes up for them.

And then there was the UK’s first televised debate between the leaders of the three main political parties, 50 years after the USA first held televised debates between presidential candidates. I say hurrah! What better way to address the nation in the run-up to an election. I hope that this will set a precedent for every future election. And hey! Quirky or what?! ITV’s poll, whose first results were announced within 30 minutes of the end of the debate, showed that Nick Clegg, leader of our third party, the Liberal Democrats, came out as the overall winner in the minds of viewers and with a considerable margin. Putting aside the distress of some of his political opponents I think that that, too, is news worth celebrating.

Moments in history…

Learning for Life (Consulting): the research and development team

Coaching

Back from a week’s “staycation”, I am pleased to be pursuing an agenda of business development which supports my need to deliver outstanding value to my clients. Marketing is inherently a dialogue, so that I have been shaping the remit for a “Research and Development Team” for Learning for Life (Consulting) which I share here.

Maybe you will be amongst the people I invite to join this team. Maybe this is an idea you can adapt and pursue to support your own busines and career plans:

Purpose of the R&D Team

The R&D Team exists to support the development of Learning for Life (Consulting) as a successful business which maximises its contribution to its clients and sustains me, Dorothy Nesbit, in the role of Director.

About the R&D Team

Team members reflect those relationships (friends, family, colleagues and clients) and interests (leadership, coaching, NLP, NVC, Skilled Facilitator Approach etc.) which are most important to me in my life as well as in the role of Director of Learning for Life (Consulting).

Members of the R&D Team are all people who are able to recognise and sponsor in me that I am naturally creative, resourceful and whole and people who have an emotional investment in:

  • My learning, well-being and success;
  • The progress, performance and success of Learning for Life (Consulting) Ltd; and
  • The contribution Learning for Life (Consulting) Ltd has to make to its clients.

Membership of the R&D Team is by invitation and is offered on a voluntary (unpaid) basis.

Principles and values

The R&D Team is rooted in a fundamental principle: that it meets the needs of team members to contribute as well as my needs to invite your contribution. I invite you to contribute willingly and joyfully when it meets your needs to do so and to know when it doesn’t meet your needs to contribute. As the owner of the team I recognise that there will be times when you feel moved to contribute or have particular expertise to offer and other times when you don’t have time, an interest or expertise in a particular area. I support this.

It’s my aim, as leader of the R&D Team to embody the principles and values I aspire to in my life and in my work with clients. You will find a statement of my personal mission statement and my values on my blog under the heading Coaching: about your coach.

Your membership of this team is based on your willingness to contribute and your generosity in contributing. In return, I invite you to make use of any ideas, learning etc. that you experience as a result of your membership of this R&D team. Please acknowledge this team as the source of ideas where appropriate. I also request that you maintain confidentiality in terms of the content of the team’s work and its discussions.

How can you contribute as a member of the R&D Team?

As a member of the R&D Team you will receive regular communication from me about my current areas of focus. This will be via [LinkedIn? Ning? To be decided].

In addition, I will make requests of you when I would value your input, taking care to be as specific as I can be in the contributions I request of you. These requests will be guided by the need and designed to meet that need in ways which are most likely to contribute to me and to Learning for Life (Consulting) without being onerous for members of the R&D Team. This implies ongoing learning about what works and what doesn’t work. Contributions might include:

  • Invitations to online discussions with other members of the group;
  • Invitations to review plans and other documents and make comments;
  • Invitations to take part in research;
  • Invitations to hold one to one discussions or group meetings.

How might you benefit from being a member of the R&D Team?

I am keen for your membership of the R&D Team to be of benefit to you and curious about what benefits will accrue to you as a result of your membership of this team. At the same time, I hope that joining the team will be of benefit to you as much as it is of benefit to me.

I am guessing that benefits to team members will fall under the following broad headings:

  • Staying in contact: Whether or not you join this team, I value my relationship with you. I hope your membership of the R&D team will be one of the ways we stay connected;
  • Contributing to me and my progress – with ease: You have already contributed to me and that’s why you are a member of this team. I hope that being a member of the R&D team makes it easy to make the contribute you like in ways which really support me;
  • Your creativity and learning: I’m guessing that belonging to an R&D team like this may stimulate all sorts of learning and ideas for you, both in relation to the way the team works and in relation to the content of the work we do together.

The essence of leadership

Developing as a leader,

Recently author, marketeer, blogger and all round “good bloke” Seth Godin wrote about Finding Your Brand Essence on his blog. His comments, which I capture below (with amendments to the formatting and a typo or two removed) resonated with me:

I got an email from someone who had hired a consulting firm to help his company find their true brand selves. They failed. He failed. He asked me if I could recommend a better one. My answer: The problem isn’t the consultant, it’s the fact that if you have to search for a brand essence, you’re unlikely to find one. Standing for something means giving up a lot of other things, and opening yourself to criticism. Most people in the financial services industry (or any industry, actually) aren’t willing to do that, which is why there are so few Charles Schwabs in the world. First, decide it’s okay to fail and to make a ruckus while failing. THEN go searching for the way to capture that energy and share it with the world. Clothes don’t make the man, the man makes the man. Clothes (and the brand) just amplify that.

I shared them with Lynne and Kathy – my coaching team. Kathy recommended Godin’s book Linchpin and I added it straight away to my Amazon wishlist. Lynne wrote (which also resonated with me):

What popped in my mind is Wayne Dyer’s revelation that “you aren’t in charge of your own reputation.” And the subsequent freedom of that. People are going to think what they think, based largely on a whole bunch of stuff that you don’t control, like their own experiences and perspectives and filters. What counts is that you find the solidity of the truth within you, and stand on it and for it, no matter what anybody else thinks. There’s never a crowd on the leading edge.

Reading both Seth’s and Lynne’s words I am struck by the implications of their words. To me, they suggest we are all leaders and we get to choose what leadership messages we share. It’s not that everyone will follow – and still, we lead.

Essential resources for leaders: some cracking “good reads”

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What do you do when some of your favourite reads and other resources don’t quite land under a clear and easy heading? Below are some of the books and other resources that I and others have delighted in:

The Corporation: The Pathological Pursuit of Profit and Power
Joel Bakan

Available as a book and as a DVD, Bakan’s book makes a devastating case against corporate greed, exploring the implications of the laws which govern the way we do business.

One Minute Manager, One Minute Manager Meets the Monkey etc.
Kenneth H. Blanchard

These small books (and others in the series) do a fantastic job of making leadership easy to understand and to do. More than any other books I’ve recommended here they pass the “transatlantic flight test” – they’re quick to read and easy to stow in your luggage.

Good to Great and How the Mighty Fall
Jim Collins

I confess I haven’t read either of these books but my colleagues have. They may be a little dated and still they are firm favourites and at least one of them passes the “transatlantic flight test” and can be read in one go.

Oh! And for the longest reading list for leaders you’re ever likely to find go to http://www.jimcollins.com/tools/recommended-reading.html

Working with Emotional Intelligence
Daniel Goleman

Goleman has made significant contribution to our understanding of research which highlights the role that emotional intelligence plays in our success in the workplace. Essential reading for leaders, both to help them shape their own approach and to help them to coach and develop others.

Fish! A Remarkable Way to Boost Morale and Improve Results
Stephen C. Lundin, Harry Paul and John Christensen

If you’re looking to transform your leadership style, this book provides succinct guidance. Rooted in the owner’s experience of transforming the ‘World Famous Pike Place Fish Market’ (see below).

When Fish Fly: Lessons for Creating a Vital and Energized Workplace from the World Famous Pike Place Fish Market
Joseph Michelli & John Yokoyama

If you can – though it seems nigh-on impossible – get the CD abridged version of this inspiring book, which tells of the owners personal transformation and what it meant for the World Famous Pike Place Fish Market.

Quiet Leadership
David Rock

A recommendation from a colleague, I picked this book out because it is rooted in an understanding of the neuroscience of leadership.

The Soul of Money: Transforming Your Relationship with Money and with Life
Lynne Twist

For so many of us, work and money are intimately connected. But what is money and what is its meaning in our lives? Lynne Twist’s book is a compassionate and eloquent exploration of this question.

Winning!
Clive Woodward

As coach to the UK rugby team, Woodward set out to create a winning team and was both painstaking and determined in addressing every aspect of what it would take to make this dream a reality, leading to the team’s success in winning the Rugby World Cup in November 2003. A fascinating read which opens up many avenues for exploration.

The Heart Aroused: Poetry and the Preservation of the Soul in Corporate America
David Whyte

Whyte makes a powerful case for bringing ourselves fully into the workplace, offering a profound sense of what it means to locate our work deep within the soul. Whyte’s book offers a completely new perspective on what it means to work.

Life at the Frontier: Leadership Through Courageous Conversation
David Whyte

In this talk, Whyte highlights the need for authentic, real and courageous conversation whilst also recognising the challenges involved. Speaking with humour and compassion, Whyte tells some leadership home-truths.

www.TED.com

If you haven’t got time to read a book, go to www.TED.com for some twenty-minute ‘sound-bites’. This is a valuable resource for leaders who want to explore current thinking in small chunks.

Essential resources for leaders: the leader as coach

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The coaching style of leadership is one of the styles highlighted in The New Leaders (The New Leaders: Transforming the Art of Leadership, by Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee) as highly effective in creating high performance teams. The outstanding leader needs to know how to coach those he or she leads. The books below are just a few of the many great books available to support leaders in developing their coaching style.

Coaching Skills for Leaders in the Workplace: How to Develop, Motivate and Get the Best from Your Staff
Jackie Arnold

This book is tailored for leaders in the workplace and draws on a variety of sources to provide a comprehensive and practical guide for leaders who want to develop their coaching style. This is a “how to” book which covers all the bases.

From Coach to Awakener
Robert Dilts

Dilts’ thought-provoking book highlights the wide range of forms that coaching can take, from helping individuals to acquire a new skill right through to sponsoring the individual in understanding who they are and awakening their awareness of the wider system in which they live and work. This book is for leaders and coaches who want to deepen their understanding of the full range of forms that coaching can take.

Sleight of Mouth
Robert Dilts

It’s not because of the limitations of our circumstances that we get “stuck”. Rather, our perspective or “map” can prevent us from seeing ways forward. Coaching is often a matter of helping people to see old information in new ways. Sleight of Mouth draws on what we know about some of the most effective leaders to offer ways of using language to open up new ways of looking at things. An invaluable resource for the leader as coach.

Coaching: Evoking Excellence In Others
James Flaherty

Coaching is a journey of mutual learning and growth – a two-way relationship. Flaherty’s practical guidance is rooted in a clear understanding of the mutuality of the coaching relationship.

The Coaching Bible: The Essential Handbook
Ian McDermott & Wendy Jago

The Coaching Bible aims both to make the case for coaching and to offer practical guidance to help the coach to make the most of what coaching can offer. It is as valuable for the leader as coach as it is for the professional coach.

The Portable Coach: 28 Sure-fire Strategies for Business and Personal Success
Thomas J. Leonard

Leonard is often cited as the father of modern-day coaching so his book is something of a classic. For the leader as coach (as well as for the professional coach) this book offers a way to coach oneself and this in turn makes for far greater authenticity in coaching others.

Fierce Conversations
Susan Scott

Coaching is about courage as well as compassion. Fierce Conversations reflects the author’s belief that a single conversation can change the course of a career, marriage or life, showing readers how to have conversations that count. A powerful tool for the leader as coach.

Coaching for Performance: GROWing People, Performance and Purpose
John Whitmore

Whitmore’s GROW model has been widely adopted and is often shared in training programmes for leaders in the workplace. Whitmore identifies coaching as an essential leadership skill as well as providing practical approaches for the leader as coach.

Co-Active Coaching: New Skills for Coaching People Toward Success in Life and Work
Laura Whitworth, Henry Kimsey-House and Phil Sandahl

Even when you are coaching as a leader, you are entering into a relationship with those you lead which is based on mutual consent. This book offers clear guidance on the nature of the coaching relationship as well as many practical approaches.

Essential resources for leaders: leadership and communication

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So much of leadership in practice is about communication and relationships – with oneself as well as with others. This reading list sets out to identify those books that support a style of communication that is rooted in an understanding of our true nature and in the ‘win, win’ values psychologists identify. This is about sustainable approaches which meet the needs of everyone involved.

Resonant Leadership: Renewing Yourself and Connecting with Others Through Mindfulness, Hope, and Compassion
Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee

Boyatzis and McKee set out to translate the research findings outlined in their book (with Daniel Goleman) The New Leaders into practical approaches, recognising the extraordinary demands placed on leaders in today’s world.

Words that Change Minds: Mastering the Language of Influence
Shelley Rose Charvet

Our success in communication reflects our ability to appreciate the way others see the world as well as to understand our own views and perspectives. Shelle Rose Charvet’s book stands out in helping the reader to understand the language of influence.

Influence: Science and Practice
Robert B. Cialdini

Cialdini’s book comes highly recommended for anyone who has to market their ideas. This includes leaders as well as salespeople, trainers and others.

The Courage to Love: Principles and Practice of Self Relations Psychotherapy
Stephen Gilligan

Love may not be top of the list as a subject for leaders. Still, Gilligan’s book is valuable reading for the leader who wants to understand and develop his relationship with himself or others.

Nonviolent Communication: A Language for Life
Marshall Rosenberg

This is the book I have most often recommended to others since I first read it in 2003. If you want to develop an approach to leadership which understands human nature and is rooted in values of compassion and accountability, this is your essential “must read”.

The Skilled Facilitator Approach
Roger Schwarz

Schwarz’s book stands alongside Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication in translating the findings of leadership theory into clear values and approaches for effective communication. Also a leadership “must read”.

Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success in Work and in Life: One Conversation at a Time
Susan Scott

Scott makes a compelling case for open, honest and courageous conversations in every area of our lives and demonstrates how they act to create momentum, progress and success. Any senior leader who baulks at reading Scott’s input needs to keep reading – again and again and again.

Getting to Yes: Negotiating an Agreement Without Giving In
Roger Fisher, William Ury, Bruce Patton

and

Getting Past No: Negotiating with Difficult People
William Ury

Fisher, Ury and Patton have outlined ways of negotiating such that everyone wins. And whilst you may rarely think of the conversations you have as “negotiations”, you may find the wisdom outlined in these two small books supports you in the day-to-day business of leadership – from performance appraisals to meetings of the Board.